Southern Methodist University

January 2007. Ooh, Texas! Not quite the stereotype where droves of cattle wearing ten-gallon hats work on oil rigs. I mean, a few were but they were probably just humoring the tourists. SMU is a religious affiliated school - most likely Jesuit - in a little enclave of Dallas called University Park, within view of downtown's intimidating highways and skyscrapers. I wanted mustang gear and I wanted it bad. Pardon? No shop on campus? A licensed store by the rush of freeway on-ramps only? Pedestrians are moving targets in Dallas I learned. I parked at a petrol station across the street and dared to jaywalk as the nearest crosswalk was blocks away. My thoughts turned to Frogger and his lifeless red body. But since I am typing this now, I made it. The store's collection of apparel was impressive but the drinkware selection was anemic. Get with the program, Barnes & Noble! Some people want more than a Bisphenol-A bottle with pink flowers and bubbly type. We also want horsies.

Pictured above: Hank Hill, Methodist

Texas Christian University

January 2007. The TCU area of Fort Worth was much greener than I ever imagined it would be. Large stately lawns in front of every hall, marble steps leading to their entrances, a kind of UVA feel. The bookstore was gutted for renovations, leaving a raggedy trailer as its stand-in. The low ceiling threatened visiting basketball recruits to this religious affiliated - probably Jesuit - school. This travel mug was the only affordable trinket. It is top heavy, the handle is too small to fit the proper amount of stabilizing fingers, and nothing about the removable lid says durable. Its saving grace, of course, is the blinding purple. Not too many schools have the utter gall to make purple its primary color. But then again not too many schools willingly name their sports teams 'The Horned Toads'.

"They musta turned him into a h-horny toad!"

New Mexico State University

January 2007. Pistol Pete, who stole your weaponry? Pity the rugged rancher who is limited to a short range, if ultimately more useful, length of rope! Oh, what's this? They were under a haystack of pro-cartoon-firearm complaints the whole time! Well then, back to business as usual.
When NMSU brought their logo into the 21st century, they also took away their mascot's pair of six shooters. It wasn't long before they were restored. I am all for tradition over rampant political correctness - kids couldn't get a working gun that looks like that if they tried - but in this case, the lasso logo was better balanced. Pete looks kind of awkward now, like he is falling forward (perhaps he drew too late?) and will be goin' down shootin'.
The rocks glass is great, the first in this set. The weight and handfeel is top notch and the curved-in rim makes it unique although the printed design is nothing special. Las Cruces looked so sad when I passed through, covered in mist and fog. Don't get me wrong, the school looked put together but if Las Cruces was a face, it sincerely needed a shave. Is that part of its charm? I'm no New Mexican and will probably be only a tenth of one on my manliest days.

University of Arizona

Jan 2007. It was a brilliant bright day in Tucson, not to be confused with Towson and certainly not with Duck Son (duck to duck lecture pictured below). I like this mini-pilsner, don't you? 'Twould make a good size for a kid's beer. Bud Light Jr., I can't believe they haven't pulled this out of their bag of tricks yet. Wait till they get desperate (what, you mean more desperate than to sell to InBev?) then the rollout of ads featuring Dale Jr, Griffey Jr, and, by then, Kobe Jr will begin. Some may say that is precisely what Joose and Sparks are already doing and a bunch of states aren't diggin' it.